MARRIED MY ENEMY??

It is time today to think about how you might break that competitive cycle. Here are some thoughts:

Remember that you are on the same team. Commit to playing cooperatively versus competitively. Truth is, if you go looking for evidence that your spouse is your enemy, you will find it. However, if you want to see your marriage as a team, then start looking for evidence that it could be. If you go looking, don’t minimize what you find.

Embrace differences and let them be growth opportunities. As I noted before, the body of Christ has different parts that come together in unity. Same for our marriages, we are each uniquely created individuals. Are you willing to see your spouse as a creature to whom God gave unique gifts, talents and experiences? Would you be willing to embrace and dare I say even value the way that person differs from you? You might experience your spouse in a whole new way if you do. Don’t get me wrong, differences can be a great source of frustration. This is why they present as growth opportunities if you are willing to view them as such. As a result of how my wife and I differ, I get a chance to grow in my ability to manage frustration, embrace someone who is different from me, begin to modify something about me, etc. Sound unreal? Give it a try and see.

Know that there is an adversary; it’s just not your mate. Scripture describes this adversary as roaming about like a lion waiting to devour. He is also described as a thief who is bent on robbing, killing and destroying. That is who our true enemy is, not each other.

Act more like a teammate and less like an adversary. Do you realize that teammates become really good at what they do? They work tirelessly to practice and hone their skills individually while also learning how to fit into the team. Are you willing to commit to that? Are you willing to put the effort into running the race (marathon) of your marriage to the best of your ability regardless of how the other runner shows up?

I can hear the argument already, “My spouse never (won’t/can’t/doesn’t) plays like a teammate.” Well that does complicate things, but let me challenge you that it does not mean you have to stop being the best team member you can be. As Christians we are called to run the race. We are asked to sacrifice something to pursue Christ and become like Him. So you say you can’t do that. Your situation is too unique. Your spouse is too cruel, or too distant, or too controlling, or too whatever. Well, I would agree with you that you can’t do it alone. That is precisely the point; you can’t but He can. We cannot be great teammates on our own, but we serve a God who is way bigger than the problems we face. That doesn’t mean we stop trying. It does mean that we have to keep our focus on where our true strength lies (see Philippians 4:13).

I hope these ideas are helpful to you becoming a team player in your marriage. They have been of help to me in mine. If you pursue this, there will be difficult moments but there also could be great rewards. Let me offer you the first words of encouragement as any good fan would do, “Go Team!”

WHAT A MOTHER TOLD HER SON A DAY BEFORE HIS WEDDING

Are u married or just preparing for marriage? Pls read dis:

WHAT A MOTHER TOLD HER SON A
DAY BEFORE HIS WEDDING

Mummy’s boy, you are now a man. Tomorrow
you will have a new mother, a new cook and a new person to share all your secrets with. It will no longer be me but her.

Love your new mum even more than you love me. Before you walk into her arms forever, let me give you some words to guide you.

There was a day I was arguing with your father.

We were screaming, Tempers were high. I was angry and He was angry. Then I called him an idiot! He was shocked,

He looked at me asking
how dare I call him that. Immediately I started calling him idiot, fool, stupid, crazy; I called him all sort of name.

Guess what he did? He didn’t raise his hands to hit me. He just walked away, banging the door as he went out.

My Son, If your father had hit me and destroyed my eyes, how will you feel sitting here with me today? How will you regard him as your father?

Would you have been proud of him or would
you be blaming me for calling him names?

Never hit your wife! No matter the provocation
just walk away and things will be normal.

Whenever she offends you, think of this story I
just told you, it could have been your mum!

After he left, I was filled with guilt. We slept on same bed that night and I went to him the next day.

I pleaded with him, I did all I could to show am sorry and he forgave me. That day I cooked his favourite food, yes you know he loves Pounded yam & Vegetable soup right?

After that day, I never called him names, my respect for him was ten times stronger.

There is something very important you must always do, my son listen very carefully, defend your wife. When she is under pressure, stand by her. If your friends hates her, it is your duty to make them see her as a Queen. Your Uncle, I mean Uncle Yusuf, never liked me.

But Ur father was always supportive until his perception changed.

There was a day your Father was going to host the owner of his company and friends. They were three of them.

That day I was in the
kitchen cooking for them and your father went to buy drinks.

When the table was set and food was served.

Everyone started eating. Then I
remembered I did not add salt in the food. I
was embarrassed.

Your father tasted the food and looked at me. He immediately turned to the guests. He told them that he instructed his wife last month not to add salt whenever she is cooking because of some problem with his body.

He said it in a funny way and everyone laughed!

The guests understood and he asked me to
bring salt and everyone added according to their taste. He managed to eat the food without salt.

After the guest left, he went on his knees and
asked God to forgive him for lying.

Your wife is like a baby, sometimes she don’t
know what to say or do. Stand up and speak for her!

Now let me talk to you about Sex. You see Sex
is a wonderful thing.

Do not be surprised if your wife enjoy and need Sex more than you do.

There were days, I needed Sex more than your father and there were days he needed it more than me but the important thing is to always try to satisfy the other when they need you.

Don’t always think of your self.

There was a time things were hard and I
needed to do two jobs to support your father.
One night I was so tired. When I got to bed he was in the mood. He try to make love to me and I didn’t refuse him. I was tired but I felt I needed to be there when he needs me.

When he tried undressing me, he saw my look and he stopped. He asked what was wrong and I said nothing. But he understand me better.
He stopped and then started telling me stories until I fell asleep.

My son, Sex is best enjoyed when the two
parties are physically and mentally ready for it.

Sometimes, read your wife and understand her.

Make it a habit to go anywhere with your wife. Beside your job, move around with her.

If anyone invite you to his house and told you not to come with your wife then be very careful.
Use wisdom.

I know you love mummy… I know you will tell me all your problems. But now things will be different.

Let your wife be the first to know before me. Let her be the first to see before me.

When you have problems with her don’t run to me immediately.

Wait for a day to pass and then talk to her about it. Pray about it.

Report her to nobody but talk issues out within yourself.

Finally, don’t forget to come and visit me with
your wife every month!

I know you will have a happy home.

You will always be mummy’s boy.

God will bless Ur
home.
Pls don't forget God, pray & seek His
assistance always..
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#CheerfulCare......